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There was something else I was going to say here today but this other thing has come up and it's been dominating my mind. An incident occured recently that brought the subject of class rushing up to the foreground of my thoughts. I was shocked to find that underneat a wide range of emotions lurked that old feeling from childhood of being one of the kids in grade school who couldn't automatically go on the class trip or get the new gym shoes or participate in pizza day. I recalled the shame of those incidents and the fear of asking my parents for the money and being uncertain of their reaction.

I'm thirty now and my parents haven't figured into my financial situation for going on half my life, but I didn't realize how strong those feelings from childhood were. I thought I was over that stuff. I'm an adult and I have made choices about where I am and why and how. And yet when it comes down to it I can still feel like the kid who doesn't belong. I remember when I first started university. Feelings of being out-of-place and that I wasn't supposed to be there were very strong. That I was pushing beyond borders that I technically wasn't supposed to cross.

Incidently bell hooks will be speaking in Toronto this Saturday. She has a great book called "Where We Stand: Class Matters" that delves into the intersections between class and race.



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