If you're in the Toronto area this March, come out and see our pictures all big and stuff!
The other day I was flipping through the 10 channels we get (most of which are completely unwatchable due to bad reception) when I caught a soundbite from one of those shitty entertainment news magazines. The female host said something like, "Could the reason behind Drew Barrymore's recent breakup with rocker _________ (I don't remember the name) be armpit hair? Drew recently showed up at such and such Big Hollywood Industry Party with fuzzy armpits." Cut to close-up of armpit with the tiniest spot of hair showing.
I could not beleive it! I was so appauled. I could care less about celebrities and their love lives but COME ON! What is it with the North American obsession with women's body hair? I have had countless conversations with female friends about the crazy responses we get during tank top weather when, god forbid, we *GASP*, go outside into the public with hairy armpits. I have noticed that some people actually look at me like I've pulled down my pants and flashed my pubic hair. Keep her away from the children!
My first introduction to the armpit hair section of The Women's Rule Book took place on the school yard in grade six. It was recess time and I was walking across the pavement towards the grass to go look for four leaf clovers. Okay why wasn't anyone harrassing me about THAT I ask you? Anyway, a former friend, Jennifer Sacco approached to quietly inform me that I had some armpit hair and that I should immediately shave it off. I was shocked. I hadn't even noticed the barely visible few strings of hair or their hideousness, and I certainly was not aware that it was my duty as a citizen to have them removed for the sake of others. Back then I was a kid who couldn't deal with any sort of confrontation so the fact that I was in fact being confrontational by even having armpit hair freaked me out. I kept my arms down the entire day and never wore tank tops to school again.
It's no wonder that girls get so fucked up around the preteen years. There's just way too many things about our bodies that we're supposed to be neurotic and hateful about.