Sunday, March 12, 2006     « Blossom »

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    "If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive." - Audre Lorde

I am very pleased with myself; there are no conditions, or what-ifs, or shouldas, or couldas, or criticisms.

I took the day off yesterday and I couldn't have lucked into better weather. It was beautiful. I walked and walked and took pictures, and saw things. It really was wonderful to just BE. I am proud of recent accomplishments, but I was becoming increasingly desperate for some time to live and produce without conditions, or pressure.

One afternoon of release was all it took to get my mind swimming wildly. By chance, we happened upon an art bookstore on our travels. By chance my hand went straight for a book called, "The Restless Decade." At that exact moment four simple words that perfectly encapsulate my intentions behind the last few years of picture-making popped into my head like it had been there all along. I still can't believe it. Serendipitous.

Song: "I Wish I Knew How It Would Feel to be Free" by Nina Simone.


Oh and I almost forgot: we saw six herons yesterday! I had just talked (in Friday's Guerilla Gardening presentation) about the city as a place of surprises and the possiblility of co-existing alongside nature and there it was. It was hard to walk away. I couldn't believe how many people walked right past without looking!

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